Candid Camera

It is so hard to be away from the one you love and watch them go through tough times.

Kingsley is a British citizen and I am an American citizen. He needs a visa to live here even though we are getting married. Despite what many people believe, marrying an American citizen does not give you automatic permission to be in the US. God, how I wish it was that easy.

Our K-1 Fiance visa petition was approved by the US government but now Kingsley has received the information on how to apply for the actual visa through the US Embassy in London. There are literally 4 steps (just to apply to get an interview!!) with about 8 components to each step. Details include: x-rays, blood tests, fingerprints, photo verification, forms, online forms an interview, affidavit of financial means, every address ever lived at, police certificates...

We both (along with his dear mother) have now spent hours online researching the steps and reading the lists of things the US government needs. This is all for a non-immigrant visa! I can only imagine the horrendous amount of work applying to become a citizen will entail.

At the end of the day, here I am alone in Oregon while my love is in London and we are both afraid to talk about how all of this upsets us so much. If we mention our disappointment out loud, I'll probably start crying and Kingsley is already stressed enough! Why can't life be just a tilch easier?

It unlikely Kings will be awarded a fiance visa before our wedding so he will have to return to the UK and that is not what we wanted at all. I am feeling sad for myself but the worst part is feeling helpless when it comes to encouraging Kingsley.

Advice? An encouraging word for me??

Paperwork

I finally started in on the long task or stuffing invites. It was fun though because I love the quality of the paper.

The invites are from William Arthur and come with a gold bow. Nice!

Some are finished...

A few more...

Finally the whole lot...

BATP's Inner-dorkyness

I know I'm pretty cool. I mean, come on. Who isn't cool these days? But sometimes, you have to confess the inner-dorkyness.

I like to crochet AND I fall down a lot.

I've tripped and fallen twice outside my apartment in the last week. My neighbors must truly think I have a health problem which causes me to seizure and fall over when I see daylight.

Two different nights I decided to move my plants. Once when it was hailing and I wanted to put them under cover. That's when I slipped on the ice. Last night I decided to put the plants back out on the sidewalk and I tripped on my pant leg and fell again. This time I have a knee cap the size of a grapefruit and a broken tera-cotta pot. My plants are trying to kill me.

AND, I'm kinda dorky.

Our wedding blog

I've been keeping a wedding blog as well to let friends and family know about arrangements and wedding registries. Click here to visit.

The cure for writer's block...

...is to ramble. You're supposed to start writing even if it is a spew of nonsense. I apologize up front for the lack of creativity or cognate thoughts in this post.

I'm babysitting my friend Kim's cat Violet. She is small and still in the kitten phase, absolutely adorable. She meows like a tiny mouse. I finally had to remove the annoying bell collar, though. At 5 in the morning I was still listening to: tingalingaling, tingtingting, tingaling...

I raced outside to save my plants from the hail on Sunday. Instead of walking out calmly and moving them in an athletically confident way, I ran wild like I was saving children from a fire. So, of course, I slipped on the ice and fell. When I fell, a 1/2 inch long splinter lodged into my hand. I felt a tiny bit of pain and glanced at it for a minute and thought it was a scratch. Later, I picked it out using my nails and was impressed with my own toughness.

My upstairs neighbors have been going at it - romantically shall we say - for an hour. My goal is to be in a house (one that I own) or at least in the penthouse suite by this time next year.

Our wedding invitations arrived today and I love them. They are a gorgeous, weighty ivory paper with raised gold lettering. The font is perfect and the small shell motif: classy with a twist of whimsy. I need to print addresses, buy a million stamps (they have to go on the response cards too) and get to stuffing. Where oh where is my groom when I need his fun spirit during chores? It is hard to explain the moment when you first see your name printed on a wedding invitation and you are the bride!

I've started Ebay-ing to see if it is possible to actually make money. So far, I'm up about $10 on two items but the amount of work is not worth it. I'm going to try my luck and evaluate after one month.

My work duties have doubled and while the day goes by must faster, my challenge is to remain calm under pressure during the hours leading up the newscast and let go of the stress when I walk out to my car at night. I listen to BBC World News on the ride home and it makes me feel lighter to know a new day is dawning in London as mine is ending here.

I love 94% fat free microwave popcorn. It could possibly be the perfect food.

Recession Seafood Platter

Haha. My mother-in-law-to-be has a fantastic sense of humor and sent this "South Africa Recession Seafood Platter." Hope your weekend was full of great laughs.

Spring has Sprung

We made it through winter! Friday was the first official day of spring and I celebrated early by planting Pansies and Anemone on Thursday evening. We had mild temperatures and a lovely sunset. Today, though, back to cold and rainy. Hope you are having a great weekend!

To Do

Just when you think you're almost finished...

1. Invitations
2. Photobook for guests
3. Buy/pack steamer for dress
4. Decide on and email signature cocktail choices to caterer
5. Buy things for and create welcome baskets
6. Buy special sugar cookies for favors
7. Dress fittings
8. Book airline ticket
9. Makeup practice and buy all products MAC
10. Design and print ceremony programs
11. Design and print cocktail hour menus
12. Gift for parents
13. Gift for groom
14. Place cards
15. Design place card table and buy decorations
16. Table numbers
17. Schedule mani/pedi
18. Design and build Photoshow for reception of bride and groom
19. Pack scrapbook
20. Ask friend Kevy (professional videographer) about recording the ceremony
21. Change mothers' flowers from corsage to posies
22. Change all attendants' flowers to fuchsia
23. Ask dad about making a speech
24. Speech from bride/groom

And that's just the half of it... Brides: what am I missing? Most of the other big stuff is complete.

The Pope and Condoms

Whoa, this is a shocker. The Pope was quoted saying "condoms increase the problem of AIDS" in Africa today. This is horribly troubling on so many levels. The Vatican has released a statement backing up his reasoning. There has been, understandably, outrage all over the world after hearing this.



“My reaction is that this represents a major step backwards in terms of global health education, is entirely counter-productive, and is likely to lead to increases in HIV infection in Africa and elsewhere,” said Prof Quentin Sattentau, Professor of Immunology at Britain’s Oxford University.

The Business Day article goes on to say: The Church teaches that fidelity within heterosexual marriage and abstinence are the best ways to stop AIDS. Asked about the criticism, Vatican spokesman Father Federico Lombardi said the pope was “maintaining the position of his predecessors”.

What? Because of the history of Catholic beliefs - which say "no" to birth control, we must throw out all sound reasoning, responsibility and truth? Pope Benedict XVI is supposed to be an educated man.

Are his comments much different from those of the former South African deputy president Jacob Zuma? Zuma testified in a rape case brought against him by a HIV positive women in public court that he minimised his risk of contracting the AIDS virus during unprotected sex, "by taking a shower afterwards."

Did the Pope, revered by many as a world leader, do anything to educate people today?

He did say this: "The saving message of the Gospel needs to be proclaimed loud and clear so that the light of Christ can shine into the darkness of people's lives," as the president and other political leaders looked on.

“Anything that reduces AIDS on a depressed continent like Africa should be welcomed,” said Adeleke Agbola, a lawyer in Nigeria, Africa’s most populous nation.

I understand, reason doesn't always jive with religion. But guess what? - even if you present an iron-clad stance on abstinence until marriage - condoms prevent the spread of HIV and sexually transmitted diseases.

HIV, the virus that can lead to AIDS, infects 33 million people globally and has killed 25 million.

A New York Times editorial said the pope “deserves no credence when he distorts scientific findings” about condoms.

France's foreign minister already has something to say about this nonsense: “While it is not up to us to pass a judgement on the doctrines of the Church, we consider that such remarks put in danger public health policy and imperative needs regarding the protection of human life.”

Belgian Health Minister Laurette Onkelinx said the pope’s comments “... reflect a dangerous doctrinaire vision. His declarations could demolish years of prevention and education and endanger many human lives.”

Major Slacker

I'm kinda anal about updating my blog, like e'ery day. But...recently I've been a Major Slacker.

Below are possible reasons as to why I've had no time for Blond Across the Pond (You can vote on your favorite):

1. Laziness
2. New responsibilities at work
3. Too much time with the chips and salsa
4. Someone's getting hitched
5. Needed more time to write long petitions against the new Facebook
6. Shopping E-bay every night to find the perfect shade of fuchsia shoes
7. Daydreaming about a girls weekend in Vegas
8. The nose picking habit is back
9. Busy reading Rich Like Them
10. Crochet

The Opera

Sunday was fun with a quick trip to the matinee performance of The Eugene Opera's Don Giovanni. This was written by Wolfgang Armadeus Mozart, performed in Italian and the music was phenomenal. In a box seat, I had a perfect view into the orchestra pit and was mesmerized by the musicians and different instruments.



Don Giovanni is a womanizer who attempts to bed every woman he comes across. Eventually those he betrayed come together to band against him. He never repents.

The performance was touching and the talent amazing. Here's a short clip from a wedding celebration which Giovanni crashes trying to seduce the bride...



How was your weekend?

Escape to Nature

There's lots of moments to experience nature on Bald Head Island. We stayed in a home on the golf course hidden by trees. At dusk, we would take nature walks and found the roosting spot for White Ibis (marsh land bird). It was truly amazing to see them soar in one after the other at night. They are huge birds.



We also found the nest of an Osprey (one of the largest birds of prey in North America). Apparently it lays eggs in its nest on the edge of the golf course each year.



Mom posed by a huge old tree on our walk. It was Feb and still quite chilly.

Da' Boys

The boys (Kingsley and my Daddio) were actually pretty helpful during all of the crazed wedding planning on Bald Head Island. Kingsley is (usually) a very calm person and he helped balance my anxiety over making sure things are going to be "perfect" for the wedding. Mom and I have lofty ideas and high hopes and I am so happy with how things are turning out.



Daddio provided comic relief as well as a sense of calm and I'm so happy they were both there to help mom and I enjoy the vacation while we were planning. They took us out to dinner for surf and turf, cooked and even hunted for seashells -- which we need for a wedding project.

They also got some time on the golf course, of COURSE.

One of the stops during the trip was the tux shop.

Kings is going to wear a gorgeous espresso brown tuxedo with ivory shirt and ivory vest and tie (shown on model).

Daddio and Paul (best man) will wear the same tux with dark brown matching tie and vest. They are all going to be so handsome and I look forward to checking out my gorgeous groom on our wedding day!

Game Night!

I had so much fun last night. My friend Annie was heading over to her friend's house to hang out and I met up with them. After awhile we decided to break out the board games. It has been so long since I've played! We had some stiff competition (girls versus boys) for Cranium. The guys won because they cheated (kidding) and it was a blast.

Look how cute the playing pieces are:

And one of the best moments of the night - when Eric drew a green card and had to act out a celebrity. See if you can guess who it is supposed to be:

If you need stress relief, try Cranium. We were shouting, laughing, drawing, acting, spelling and puppeting - having a fab time.

My Pink Nubby Robe

I'm actually being quite candid while I write this post. I am crying a little. My pink nubby robe that I have had since high school had to be retired today. I ripped a hole in the back while moving furniture and I am mourning for it like a family pet. Why this strange emotional reaction for a piece of fabric?

I guess I'm going through some growing pains. When you are engaged to be married no one tells you that this huge change of marriage can be a little scary.
Since the age of 17, I have lived away from my parent's home working to get ahead in college and full-time employment. For 12 years I have made my own decisions and really haven't had to okay anything with anyone. That is going to change as marriage is a partnership and when you make a life-time commitment you no longer only think of yourself.

My nubby pink robe was soft. It had been washed hundreds of times. I even specially spot-treated this robe when I spilled ink on it during collage. But it is not pretty. The sleeves are too short and it is horribly ugly and shoddy. It is just not appropriate for a newly wed. This kind of robe is only for the single girl, worn in the comfort of her private space. The tear was inevitable because it was threadbare and the fabric discolored from repeated washings.

As comfortable as it is, and although I have had it for 16 years, I know I cannot keep my pink robe. Before I placed it in the trash this morning, I held it to my face for a long time. I smelled it's comforting smell and felt the well-worn cloth. It reminded me of a pink blanket I had as a young child.

I will not keep the robe. My life is changing and I should get ready for it. Another full length, warm and cozy robe will come along. Perhaps it will also be pink! The up-swing of getting married however, is I won't always need a long nubby robe - there will be other ways to stay warm. :)

Tough Job But Someone Has To Do It

I blogged about all of the jobs I needed to get done while on Bald Head Island for the wedding. Well, one of our stop-offs was the cake lady. Mary Norwood has been baking wedding cakes for 20 years and she has experience transporting them to BHI and setting them up. Perfect!



We are doing a cake similar to the one in the picture except with ivory butter cream frosting and fuchsia flowers including orchid blossoms. I also do not want greenery as shown in the picture. Our silver tray will be different than this one as it is on a foot.



We tasted a yellow cake with butter cream frosting. We decided to go plain (Kingsley doesn't like chocolate) but my mom and I insisted on raspberry swirl for the filling.



Yumm! Of course I needed to go back for more...



Mary brought out the cake models so we could determine what size we like. We decided to go with the sizing below...and the tray the cake is on.



Whatcha think?

Wish My Thumbs Were Faster

Had a nice conversation with a good friend tonight. Made me feel a little old.

Friend: "I sent him texts but he doesn't text me back. He calls. I don't like that..."
Me: (Gulp) "Um, I'd rather call instead of text too."
Friend: "Oh."
Me: "How old is this guy?"
Friend: "Early 30s."
Me: "Oh."

My gorgeous friend is a few years younger than me and she is very quick at the texting. I can also text with the best of them but I would prefer to email, Facebook or call. I'm just not too fast at texing. Granted, it could be the CRAP phone I have. It is a Sprint model, tiny and always automatically changes to words like dron instead of from.



Am I the only one left in this world who isn't excelling in texting?

Led Astray

It looks so friendly AND helpful doesn't it?

Just a nice piece of technology... but really, it is evil. This little tool will try to ruin your life. Problem is, it happens slowly.

*Ding* Turn right onto Jackson Blvd in 1.2 miles.

Simple enough. You smile to yourself thinking, ah...this is so fabulous. Even though I'm driving in another state to a shopping mall I've never seen before...no worries. I have a GPS!

*Ding* Turn left in 2.5 miles.

While on Bald Head Island planning my wedding, mom and I decided to go shopping. We wanted to get a few details squared away for the wedding weekend including candles and details for menus and such... We used my father's precious GPS to lead us into Wilmington, NC. Arriving in less than an hour, we smiled at each other with the false sense of security that comes with letting a satellite-operated tool guide your way.

After running our errands in Wilmington, my mom and I programmed our final destination into the GPS and started driving. Blabbing away about orchids versus roses and cream versus ivory we followed our trusty electronic leader. After about 35 minutes we noticed nothing looked familiar but according to G we were only 10 miles from Southport (where you catch the boat to the island.)

*Ding* Turn left in 2 miles.

Peering at the GPS screen, I notice our route seems to end in a body of water ahead. On our map there is a broken green line crossing said body of water. My mind was trying to catch up with the computer and I was too slow to figure out what was going on. It hit my mom first...

Mom: "Oh NO!" "Ohhhhhh noooooo!"

Me: "What?"

Mom: "This stupid thing took us the wrong way."

Me: "How do you know...?"

Mom: "I just saw the signs for the Fort Fisher Ferry. It is taking us to a ferry to get across to Southport!!!!!"

Me: "You have got to be kidding me! Okay, well we are close to Southport...less than 8 miles away. Maybe we can find another way?"

We stopped the car and tried to program in another route. GPS was firm and steadfast...leading us straight into the water via a ferry. Not good. So... I broke out the Atlas and turned to North Carolina. I wasn't going to let a piece of plastic get the better of me!

Long story short, there was no way to get to Southport from Fort Fisher because there are no bridges across the inter-coastal waterway. We were stuck driving all the way back to Wilmington, crossing the water via the interstate and going to Bald Head Island back the way we came.

As we started driving away from our turn-around point...

*Ding* Make a legal U-turn.

Me, Mom: "SHUT UP!"

Some Guy That Goes On TV to Get A Wife

I should immediately post a disclaimer: it has been years since I've watched an episode of The Bachelor. Even so, I hate it. How silly for women to line up and fight over one man. The concept goes against what I think should happen in a normal dating scenario. How do these girls even know if they'll like this guy and his child?

Worse than the show? The obsession over it by American reality TV fans.

It's the top story on the web right now. Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, Yahoo and Google is clogged with messages and news stories about the guy dumping the last contestant. She is supposed to get a ring and a wedding proposal but she didn't. A horrible ending! Tears! Outrage from fans!

Hmmm...could it be IT WAS PLANNED THAT WAY? The ABC producers are not stupid. Whatever drives the ratings and they have doubled over last year. Please, do yourself a favor and pick up a book.

Travel Is A Gal's Best Friend

Even though I live for the moment of take-off from one destination headed to another, there are aspects of air-travel I could do without. Taking flight often messes with my head (perhaps it's the altitude?) and I begin muttering to myself under my breath.

"When, WHEN are you going to change careers and get a job that can pay for first class flights?"



Gosh, I love to hate air travel. Have you ever had to deal with this one: The boarding agent calls your "zone" and you go through the ticket line. As it inches down the corridor toward the plane, everyone seems to be crabby. There is no luggage room left on the flight so the attendant checks your rolling bag (checks to see if there is anything they can break on the way to the belly of the plane). The crowd in front of you starts to slowly part as travelers find their rows, re-adjust their overhead baggage, stand and clean their reading glasses in the aisle and finally sit down to let you pass.

Slowly, lugging a huge carry-on to avoid over-priced checked baggage fees, you make your way toward the back of the plane. Checking the row numbers, with a creeping sense of dread you notice one open seat in the back of the plane, near the bathroom, in between two very large people. Your heart of heart sinks. 5 hours cramped into misery. With a forced smile you grin and say, "How are you?" as you attempt to slide into your seat without knocking over a super-sized McDonald's Diet Coke.

The man I sat next to from Atlanta to Portland was an interesting character. He clearly felt he was entitled to the arm rest and not only used it the entire trip, he nudged me with his elbow every time he moved. Not that big of a deal except I tried sleep as an escape and was not able to get shut eye with the never-ending nudging. After a while I opened my right eye and looked at him without turning my head. Was this a joke? Yes, the joke is on the economy fare passenger. But really, there are worse things...

My trip to North Carolina was divine. More posting tomorrow! I have jet lag.